I'm The Real Jason Duncan, back with another edition of Beyond the Grind – showing entrepreneurs how to stop being slaves to their own businesses and start building assets that run without them. 🚀

I was sitting at dinner with my wife one night.

She was telling me something about her day.

I was nodding along, making the right facial expressions, occasionally saying “uh-huh” and “really?”

Then there was silence.

She was looking at me with that expression I've learned to recognize.

The one that says, “I just asked you a question and you have no idea what I said.”

I had no clue if she'd asked me something, made a comment that needed a response, or was waiting for me to share something.

I was physically sitting across from her, but mentally I was replaying a conversation with someone else from earlier that day.

The awkward pause stretched longer.

Finally, I had to admit it: “I'm sorry, I was thinking about something else. What did you say?”

The disappointment in her eyes wasn't anger.

It was resignation.

Like she'd grown accustomed to talking to someone who wasn't really there.

That moment hit me harder than any missed sale or failed project ever could.

I was present in body but absent in spirit.

And the person I love most had learned to expect only half of me.

The Real Problem

Be honest: You've convinced yourself that partial presence counts.

That being in the room is enough.

That “at least I'm here” justifies the mental multitasking.

But here's the truth: your people can tell when you're gone.

They know when you're nodding along while mentally solving business problems.

They recognize the glazed look that means you're somewhere else.

They've learned to compete with your thoughts for your attention.

How do I know other people know when I’m not present? Because I know when other people aren’t present with me…and I don’t like it. 

I feel disrespected, unimportant, and like a nuisance. 

In The Exiter Club, tenet #8 of our credo states: “We shall be generous with our own time and resources in order to make a positive impact on the world.”

You can't give what you don't have.

If you're mentally at the office when you're physically anywhere else, you don't actually have time to give.

Your spouse gets the leftovers of your mental energy.

Your kids get the scraps of your attention.

Your friends get the echo of your presence.

The problem isn't that you're not trying to be present.

The problem is that you've trained your brain to be everywhere except where you are.

You've become addicted to mental multitasking.

Your mind automatically defaults to business mode, even during personal moments.

You've lost the ability to be fully here, fully now, fully engaged.

Why This Matters

If you can't be present now while you're building your business, you won't magically be present later when you achieve your exit.

If you can't turn off your business brain during a family dinner, you won't be able to enjoy the freedom you're working toward.

The exit lifestyle isn't just about working less.

It's about being fully alive in the life you built the business to support.

But presence is a skill.
And like any skill, it atrophies when you don't use it.

Every moment you spend mentally absent while physically present weakens that muscle.

Every conversation you have while thinking about something else makes it harder to truly connect.

The people you're building this business for don't need your future freedom.

They need your present attention.
Your undivided focus.
Your complete engagement.

Not someday when you exit.

Today, while you're building.

Now What?

Step 1: Create Presence Boundaries

Your phone is the enemy of presence.

I learned this the hard way when I realized how often I was checking it during family time.

The constant notifications, the urge to “quickly” respond to emails, the mental pull toward the next urgent thing.

It was stealing my attention from the people who mattered most.

I've been experimenting with boundaries to reclaim my attention from the constant digital pull. Some work better than others, but they all require intentional effort.

I propose we all adopt three non-negotiable boundaries:

1. The Phone Stack Rule during family meals: everyone puts their phone face-down in the center of the table. First person to check gets stuck with cleanup duty.

2. The Two-Hour Rule when you’re at home: two full hours of uninterrupted time before you check anything business-related. No emails, no Slack, no "quick" calls.

3. The Sunday No Social Rule: Sundays should be set aside as days when we do not look at any social media on our phones. No Reels, no Shorts, no Facebook, nothing. Instead, have coffee, conversation, and connection.

I've been practicing this Sunday rule for a while now, and I'll be honest with you.

It's unbelievably hard. Which should be easy, right?

The fact that avoiding social media for one day feels difficult proves how addicted I've become to my phone.

But every Sunday I stick to it, I remember what it feels like to be fully present without the constant mental noise.

These aren't suggestions.

They're boundaries.

And boundaries only work when you enforce them consistently.

Step 2: Practice the "Where Am I?" Check

Throughout your day, ask yourself this question: “Where am I?”

Not physically…Mentally.

If you're at your kid's play, are you actually watching the performance? Or are you mentally drafting tomorrow's emails?

If you're having coffee with a friend, are you listening to their story? Or are you thinking about your afternoon meetings?

If you're wrapping presents, are you enjoying the process? Or are you calculating year-end numbers?

The “Where Am I?” check forces you to notice when you've mentally left the building.

And once you notice, you can choose to come back.

Set a reminder on your phone to ask this question every hour. When you catch yourself mentally somewhere else, don't judge it. Just return.

Gently bring your attention back to where you are.

Step 3: Give the Gift of Full Attention

The most generous thing you can do is give your complete attention when you're with people.

Not partial attention while you multitask.
Not distracted attention while you check notifications.
Full attention.

When your spouse is talking, listen to understand, not to respond.
Put down whatever you're holding.
Make eye contact.
Ask follow-up questions that show you're engaged.

When your kids are showing you something, look at what they're showing you.
Stop what you're doing.
Get on their level.
Respond with enthusiasm that matches their excitement.

When your team is celebrating a win, celebrate with them.
Be in that moment.
Feel the joy of shared success.
Don't immediately move to the next problem.

When you're at dinner, be at the dinner.
Taste your food.
Laugh at the stories.
Contribute to the conversation.

This isn't about working less. It's about being more present when you're not working.

Step 4: The Test

Here's how you'll know if you're successfully practicing presence:

People stop saying “never mind” when they try to tell you something and realize you're distracted.

Your family stops competing with your phone for attention.

You start remembering conversations you had yesterday instead of wondering what people were talking about.

You find yourself laughing more during interactions.

You realize that the business doesn't fall apart when you're fully present for two hours.

People start seeking you out for conversations again because they know you'll actually listen.

Your spouse stops repeating themselves because they know you heard them the first time.

Your kids start telling you about their day without being asked.

You stop feeling guilty about “wasted time” when you're just enjoying someone's company.

This is what presence feels like when you practice it consistently.

The Real Gift

The people you love don't need your future success. They need your present attention.

And you deserve to enjoy the relationships you're working so hard to provide for.

Not someday. Today.

Not after you exit. While you're building.

Presence isn't a luxury you'll enjoy later. It's a practice you must develop now.

Because #theexitlifestyle you're working toward is only meaningful if you know how to be fully alive when you get there.

Words of Wisdom

"Better is a dry morsel with quiet than a house full of feasting with strife." – Proverb 17:1

Until next time…

Go beyond the grind,
The Real Jason Duncan 🚀

P.S. If you found yourself thinking about something else while reading this newsletter, you just identified your starting point. The practice begins now. Right here. Be here.